November 27, 2024, 04:41:01 PM

Author Topic: The NWS Game  (Read 25860 times)

Offline Anistorm

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #45 on: April 18, 2009, 03:03:22 AM »
maybe I should make another one. I want to play more!

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN EL CENTRO CA HAS ISSUED A DUCK WARNING AT THE BUCKLIN PARK DUCK POND. THERE ARE A LARGE AMOUNT OF DUCKS ARRIVING BUCKLIN POND FOR A NEW PLACE TO LIVE. JUST TO TELL YOU THAT THESE DUCKS ARE HARMLESS........UNLESS YOU GET CLOSE TO THEM, THERE IS A 99.99% CHANCE THAT THESE DUCKS WILL BITE YOU. EL CENTRO HAS FINALLY CHANGED IT'S NAME TO DUCK CENTRO DUE TO THE LARGE AMOUNT OF DUCKS. THAT'S ALL FOR NOW.
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Offline brbjambajuice

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #46 on: April 18, 2009, 11:40:24 PM »
THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN HOUSTON HAS ISSUED A RAIN WARNING. RAIN IS EXPECTED TO FALL DOWN IN YOUR AREA. THE RAINFALL IS DETECTED TO BE FALLING AT HALF AN INCH PER HOUR. THIS MEANS THE DORUGHTS WILL BE GONE. END MESSAGE.


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Offline Anistorm

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #47 on: April 21, 2009, 03:38:12 PM »
THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN DUCK CENTRO, CA HAS ISSUED A HEAT WARNING ALL AROUND IMPERIAL COUNTY. HIGHS WILL REACH IN TO THE 100s AND IT WILL BE UNSEASONABLY HOT. THIS MEANS DRINK PLENTY OF WATER, GO SWIMMING, ESCAPE TO THE BEACH, DO ANYTHING THAT COOLS YOU OFF. DO NOT I REPEAT DO NOT COME TO DUCK CENTRO AS THIS HEAT CAN FRY YOU TO DEATH (IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO HEAT). THIS WARNING WILL BE IN EFFECT UNTIL THIS COMING WEDNESDAY AS TEMPERATURES DECREASE TO THE 90S OR EVEN INTO THE 80S. EVEN THOUGH SUMMER IS AROUND THE CORNER, YOU STILL NEED TO COOL OFF. THAT'S ALL FOR NOW.
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Offline Rico

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #48 on: April 21, 2009, 08:46:13 PM »
SNITCH EMERGENCY
*EAS ACTIVATION REQUESTED
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE BLACKSBURG VA
8:24PM EDT TUE APR 19 2009

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN BLACKSBURG HAS ISSUED A

* SNITCHING EMERGENCY FOR

*FRANKLIN COUNTY IN NORTH CENTRAL KENTUCKY

*THE FOLLOWING COUNTIES IN TENNESSEE:

*CARTER
*UNICOI
*WASHINGTON

*AND THE FOLLOWING COUNTIES IN NORTH CAROLINA

*WATAUGA
*ASHE
*AVERY
*ALEXANDER
*BURKE
*CALDWELL
*CATAWBA
*IREDELL
*LINCOLN
*MECKLENBURG
*UNION
*ANSON

*AND THE FOLLOWING COUNTIES IN SOUTH CAROLINA

*YORK
*CHESTER
*FAIRFIELD
*LANCASTER
*CHESTERFIELD
*KERSHAW
* MARLBORO

*UNTIL 12:00AM EDT DEC 31 2009

AT 8:00PM EDT, LOCAL LAW ENFORCEMENT IN ASHE COUNTY REPORTED A 28 YEAR OLD GOT OFF THE NUMBER 76 BUS AT THE RENSSEALEAR SPRINGS POLICE DEPARTMENT AND REPORTED SOMEONE RAMMED INTO HIS 2008 TOYOTA PRIUS. THE SUSPECT IS HEADING SOUTH ON HIGHWAY 421 TOWARDS HIGHWAY 321. HE WAS DRIVING A 2007 HYUNDAI i30 WITH DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA LICENSE PLATES. LOCATIONS IMPACTED INCLUDE... RENSSEALEAR SPRINGS, NORTH WILKESBORO, HICKORY, LINCOLNTON, CHARLOTTE, ROAN MOUNTAIN, ROCK HILL, CHESTER, RIDGEWAY, INDIAN LAND, UNIONVILLE, WADESBORO, AND BENNETTSVILLE. IF YOU ARE IN THE PATH OF THIS SUSPECT, PLEASE TAKE SHELTER IN THE LOWEST LEVEL OF YOUR HOME OR IN THE BOOT OF YOUR CAR. THIS IS AN EXTREMELY DANGEROUS SITUATION. PLEASE DIAL THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE OFFICE IN BLACKBURG NEAREST YOU AT 1-877-633-6772. IF THIS CROSSES INTO ALEXANDER COUNTY, YOU MUST REPORT THIS TO THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN GREENVILLE/SPARTANBURG. IF THIS CROSSES INTO CHESTER COUNTY, YOU MUST REPORT THIS TO THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN COLUMBIA. IN ADDITION TO THE DISGUSTING SCHOOLMATE WARNING, AN ADDITIONAL YOUTUBE PRAT ADVISORY HAS BEEN ISSUED FOR THE SAME DURATION OF TIME AS THE SNITCH EMERGENCY.

LAT... LON... RSN CH 321 2234 332 103 3984 445 4033

$*
RW 
« Last Edit: April 21, 2009, 11:59:52 PM by rico »
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Offline WeatherSTARIII

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #49 on: June 01, 2009, 03:26:24 AM »
THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE HAS ISSUED AN EXTENDED SUPPORT WATCH FOR THE FOLLOWING OPPERATING SYSTEMS...
 
* WINDOWS XP UNTIL 2014
 
MOST NWS COMPUTERS WILL NOT RUN ON EITHER VISTA OR ON ANY NON-PC SUCH AS MACS OR LINUXES. ONCE WHEN THE EXTENDED SUPPORT PERIOD ENDS, WE MAY BE ENDING UP BACK IN THE STONEAGE.
 
SIDE EFFECTS FROM THE EXTENDED SUPPORT PERIOD INCLUDES SLOW LOAD SCREENS... BUGS... JUNK FILES... MORE BUGS... AND MORE SLOW LOADING TIMES.
 
THE FUTURE OF COMPUTERS (AND MAYBE THE WEATHERSTARS) ARE UNCEARTAIN AT THIS TIME.
 
$$
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Offline Jonathan

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #50 on: June 04, 2009, 10:59:11 AM »
BULLETIN - EAS ACTIVATION REQUESTED
TORNADO WARNING
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE WICHITA KS
837 PM CDT WED JUN 11 2008

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN SPRINGFIELD HAS ISSUED A

* SUNSHINE WARNING FOR...
  ALL VIDEO GAMERS IN THE COVERAGE AREA OF THE NWS IN SPRINGFIELD.

* UNTIL MONDAY.

* AT 835 AM CDT...NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE METEOROLOGISTS WERE
  TRACKING A LARGE AREA OF CLEARING THAT MAY TEMPORARILY BLIND VIDEO
  GAMERS WHO SIT PLAYING VIDEO GAMES FOR UPWARDS OF
  10 HOURS A DAY.

THIS IS A DANGEROUS SITUATION.

A LIGHT BREEZE AND NO RAIN IS EXPECTED WITH THIS SYSTEM.

SUNSHINE COMING FROM THIS SYSTEM MAY COVER THE ROAD. IN THIS EVENT, A SUNSHINE FLOOD WARNING WILL BE ISSUED FOR YOUR AREA.

$$

CRAMER

« Last Edit: June 04, 2009, 11:00:46 AM by 7oa »

Offline Anistorm

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #51 on: June 04, 2009, 01:10:14 PM »
THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN DUCK CENTRO, CA HAS ISSUED A FINAL EXAM WARNING AT IMPERIAL VALLEY COLLEGE. FINAL EXAM WEEK IS NEXT WEEK AND ALL STUDENTS SHOULD BE STUDYING ALL WEEK. THIS WARNING SHOULD EXPIRE UNTIL JUNE 13. THAT IS ALL.
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Offline Austin M.

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #52 on: September 10, 2011, 11:42:13 AM »
BULLETIN - EAS ACTIVATION REQUESTED
TORNADO WARNING
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE TALLAHASSEE FL
1036 AM CDT SAT SEP 10 2011

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN TALLAHASSEE HAS ISSUED A

* CIRCLE SCRATCH WARNING FOR...

ALL XBOX 360 AND PRECIOUS GAME DISK-THAT-COST-A-LOT-OF-MONEY OWNERS...

* UNTIL EVERYTHING IS DLC, VIRTUAL, DISKS ARE ELIMINATED, OR THE CONSOLE ITSELF IS ELIMINATED.

* AT 1030 AM CDT...NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE METEOROLOGISTS WERE
  PLAYING A VIDEO GAME ON THEIR XBOX 360 CONSOLE WHEN ONE
  ACCIDENTALLY NUDGED THE CONSOLE. THE DISK INSIDE BEGAN TO SOUND
  LIKE A GARBAGE DISPOSAL AND WHEN REMOVED HAD A LARGE SCRATCH ON
  ITS SURFACE.

THIS IS A DANGEROUS AND LIFE THREATENING SITUATION.

TO REPORT DISK SCRATCHES, CONTACT YOUR LOCAL NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE OFFICE AT (8 5 0) 9 4 2 8 8 3 3, OR YOU MAY CONTACT THE LOCAL LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICES. THEY WILL RELAY YOUR REPORT TO THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE.

$$

Offline Trevor

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #53 on: September 10, 2011, 01:30:02 PM »
Sorry if this offended anyone...it was not meant to do so.

EDIT: It obviously DID offend some people, therefore, it has been taken down.
« Last Edit: September 10, 2011, 07:55:36 PM by Trevor »

Offline Mr. Rainman

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #54 on: September 10, 2011, 01:49:25 PM »
I don't know if this was exactly the best product to issue for this time of year...actually, for any part of the year.
Tiddlywinks.

Offline xoddf2

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #55 on: September 10, 2011, 04:37:16 PM »
Code: [Select]
BULLETIN - EAS ACTIVATION REQUESTED
EXPIRED SAVE BATTERY WARNING
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE TULSA OK
951 PM CDT FRI SEP 2 2011

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN TULSA HAS ISSUED AN

* EXPIRED SAVE BATTERY WARNING FOR...
  WODDFELLOW2'S COPY OF POKéMON GOLD VERSION...

* UNTIL HE CAN REPLACE IT.

$$

Offline TWCJim

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #56 on: October 03, 2011, 02:50:44 PM »
This looks like fun! Let me try...

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN SPOKANE HAS ISSUED A YAWNING WARNING FOR ALL SLEEPING PEOPLE IN THE CITY OF SPOKANE. THIS IS A SERIOUS SITUATION. IF YOU YAWN, GO BACK TO SLEEP IMMEDIATELY! STAY ON A COMFORTABLE BED AND GET TO SLEEP QUICKLY, PREFERABLY BY EITHER HITTING YOURSELF ON THE HEAD WITH A HAMMER OR BY TAKING UP TO 100 SLEEPING PILLS. STAY ASLEEP UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE. THAT IS ALL.
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Offline Mr. Rainman

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #57 on: October 03, 2011, 05:43:33 PM »
BULLETIN - EAS ACTIVATION REQUESTED
POOR FLIGHT WARNING
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE EASTERN ND/GRAND FORKS ND
4:32 PM CDT MON OCT 3 2011

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN GRAND FORKS HAS ISSUED AN

*POOR FLIGHT WARNING FOR...
 GRAND FORKS COUNTY IN NORTHEAST NORTH DAKOTA...
 NELSON COUNTY IN NORTHEAST NORTH DAKOTA...
 WALSH COUNTY IN NORTHEAST NORTH DAKOTA...

*UNTIL 10:00 PM CDT

*AT 4:25 PM CDT...NUMEROUS REPORTS OF MODERATE TO STRONG TURBULENCE WERE FILED BY STUDENT PILOTS AT THE GRAND FORKS INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT. AIRCRAFT HAVE REPORTEDLY DOVE AND RISEN SEVERAL HUNDRED FEET IN A MATTER OF SECONDS...AND SEVERAL SICKNESS BAGS HAVE BEEN OBSERVED BEING DUMPED OUT OF THE AIRCRAFT.

PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTION...

CITIZENS ARE URGED TO USE CAUTION WHEN TRAVELLING WITHIN THE AIRSPACE OF THE GRAND FORKS INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT. IF YOU ARE HIT WITH A SICKNESS BAG OR ITS CONTENTS...OR SEE AIRCRAFT SWINGING UP AND DOWN IN THE AIR...PLEASE REPORT THE INCIDENTS TO THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE...WHICH WILL HAVE NO CONTROL OVER THE MATTER.

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE WILL NO LONGER BE KEEPING TRACK OF THIS MATTER...AND WOULD LIKE TO REMIND ALL CITIZENS THAT IT DOES NOT COUNT FALLING BARF AS PRECIPITATION. PLEASE SCREW YOUR HEADS ON STRAIGHT...STOP FREAKING OUT...AND STOP SPAMMING OUR OFFICE.

$$
SIMMS


It wasn't that bad today, but it just popped into my head and I couldn't let it go.  :P

Tiddlywinks.

Offline Austin M.

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #58 on: October 03, 2011, 07:11:52 PM »
BULLETIN - EAS ACTIVATION REQUESTED
POOR FLIGHT WARNING
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE EASTERN ND/GRAND FORKS ND
4:32 PM CDT MON OCT 3 2011

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN GRAND FORKS HAS ISSUED AN

*POOR FLIGHT WARNING FOR...
 GRAND FORKS COUNTY IN NORTHEAST NORTH DAKOTA...
 NELSON COUNTY IN NORTHEAST NORTH DAKOTA...
 WALSH COUNTY IN NORTHEAST NORTH DAKOTA...

*UNTIL 10:00 PM CDT

*AT 4:25 PM CDT...NUMEROUS REPORTS OF MODERATE TO STRONG TURBULENCE WERE FILED BY STUDENT PILOTS AT THE GRAND FORKS INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT. AIRCRAFT HAVE REPORTEDLY DOVE AND RISEN SEVERAL HUNDRED FEET IN A MATTER OF SECONDS...AND SEVERAL SICKNESS BAGS HAVE BEEN OBSERVED BEING DUMPED OUT OF THE AIRCRAFT.

PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTION...

CITIZENS ARE URGED TO USE CAUTION WHEN TRAVELLING WITHIN THE AIRSPACE OF THE GRAND FORKS INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT. IF YOU ARE HIT WITH A SICKNESS BAG OR ITS CONTENTS...OR SEE AIRCRAFT SWINGING UP AND DOWN IN THE AIR...PLEASE REPORT THE INCIDENTS TO THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE...WHICH WILL HAVE NO CONTROL OVER THE MATTER.

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE WILL NO LONGER BE KEEPING TRACK OF THIS MATTER...AND WOULD LIKE TO REMIND ALL CITIZENS THAT IT DOES NOT COUNT FALLING BARF AS PRECIPITATION. PLEASE SCREW YOUR HEADS ON STRAIGHT...STOP FREAKING OUT...AND STOP SPAMMING OUR OFFICE.

$$
SIMMS


It wasn't that bad today, but it just popped into my head and I couldn't let it go.  :P
Bahahahaha.


BULLETIN - EAS ACTIVATION REQUESTED
WEBSITE MAINTENANCE ALERT
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE TALLAHASSEE FL
6:06 PM CDT MON OCT 3 2011

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN TALLAHASSEE HAS ISSUED A

*WEBSITE MAINTENANCE ALERT FOR...
 SKYWARNAL.COM
 SUBDOMAINS OF SKYWARNAL
...THIS EXCLUDES BLOGS...

*UNTIL 12:00 AM CDT SUNDAY...

*AT 6:06 PM CDT...IT HAS BEEN REPORTED FROM SEVERAL TRAINED STORM SPOTTERS THAT THE SKYWARNAL STORM AND HURRICANE CENTER WEBSITE IS UNDERGOING MAINTENANCE AND WILL BE DOING SO UNTIL SUNDAY MORNING AT 12AM...

PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTION...

VISITORS TO THE SKYWARNAL STORM AND HURRICANE CENTER SHOULD EXPECT PROBLEMS ACCESSING THE WEBSITE UNTIL THE EXPIRATION OF THE ALERT. ERRORS AND OTHER ODDITIES MIGHT OCCUR, HOWEVER, WE DO NOT CARE AND WE ARE ADMINISTRATING THE WEBSITE. DON'T CALL US, TWEET US, OR EMAIL US ABOUT THIS AGAIN OR YOU MIGHT GET CHEWED OUT.

$$
MULLEN


Offline Zach

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Re: The NWS Game
« Reply #59 on: October 03, 2011, 07:40:33 PM »
Boredem called :P


BULLETIC - EAS ACTIVATION REQUIRED
SCHOOL CLOSURE ADVISORY
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE RUSKIN FL
7:36 PM EDT OCT 3 2011

THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE HASS ISSUED A

*SUDDEN SCHOOL CLOSURE WARNING FOR...
 EASTERN HILLSBOROUGH COUNTY IN WEST CENTRAL FLORIDA...

*UNTIL 3:00 PM EDT

*THIS IS ONLY A TEST IN CASE WEATHER PERMITS SUDDEN CLOSURE OF SCHOOLS AND IS NOT MEANT TO BE REGARDED AS A REAL EMERGENCY... THIS IS ONLY A TEST...

PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTION...

IN CASE THIS TYPE OF BULLETIN IS TO BE ACTIVATED IN A REAL EMERGENCY, PLEASE DISMISS STUDENTS FROM SCHOOLS DESIGNATED TO THE PROPER REGION AND DO NOT OPEN INSTITUTIONS UNTIL THE SCHOOL CLOSURE ADVISORY HAS BEEN LIFTED... UNLESS OTHERWISE STATED.

$$
LAND
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